Kids Say - New Baby Edition

The big kids are beyond excited that their baby brother is finally here.  With his arrival has come lots of questions and funny conversations.

- After seeing me at home for the first time after Wyatt's birth:

Cam: (patting my tummy) Mommy why is your belly still so fat?

Me: (giving Cam the death stare)

Cam: ... I mean big?

- After seeing me in my post-birth mesh undies:

Zoey: Why are you wearing a diaper?

I thought it was funny that they didn't really notice or care too much when I nursed Wyatt the first few times.  But then...

- Zoey: Are you feeding him with your booties?

- Cam: What is he eating?

Me: Milk

Cam: How do you make the milk?

Me: My body knows that I'm not pregnant anymore and so it started making milk - it's my superpower!

Cam: (head exploding at the thought of his Mommy having a legit superpower) Wow.  Wouldn't it be cool if your nipples shot out poisonous water and killed bad guys?!

Me: Actually yes, buddy.  That would be awesome.

- Getting ready to go to soccer practice and Cam was very concerned with how I would feed the baby while at the field.

Cam: But how are you going to feed him?

Me: The same way I do at home.

Cam: But Mom, nobody wants to see your boobs.

Take Luck,

LP

Camden Says / 08

Time for another edition of Camden Says.

- Talking about trees.

Cam: What do trees give us?

Me: They give us fresh air, shade, and they are beautiful!

Cam: Yeah, they give us air, shade, and cookies!

- Shot a hole in one while putt-putting and called it a "one and a half."

- Fell off his bike, hurting his tummy, hand, and knee and said, "Dear Jesus, please help my tummy feel better."

- Calls the car wash, "wash car."

- Talking about celebrating Zoey's birthday and he said, "she stole my birthday?!"

- Trying to get Zoey to talk

Me: Zoey can you say, "mama," "dada," "bubba," "papa"?

Cam: Zo Zo can you say "dinosaur"?!

- When facing an injury

Cam: (hits his head) Ouch, I broke my forehead!

- Asks for "fresh cold water"

- Responds to things with "whaaat?!"

- Also responds to things with "ohhhh, that's a good idea, Mommy!"

- A bird laid some eggs in a nest at my parents' house.  The eggs hatched and my mom asked Cam what they should name of the birds.  He said "America."

- Calls the airport, "ore-port."

- Calls headphones, "ear pluggers."

- Becoming a home-body

Cam: I don't want to go to Ms. Debbie's. I want to go back home.

Me: Why not, buddy?

Cam: Because I like my Daddy.  I love him.

- Naming the planets

Me: Uranus

Cam: Ur-a-anus

- Accidentally steps on my foot.

Me: ouch!!

Cam: Oh, I'm sorry Mommy!

Me:

Cam: I forgive you.

- Climbs on a chair and stands on it

Me: You need to get down, bud.

Cam: But Mommy.  I want to be the Statue of Wiberty (Liberty)

- Talking about the weather

-Cam: It's not raining!

Me: I know!  It's supposed to be a beautiful day!

Cam: Thank you, Jesus for bringing us the sun!

Me:

Cam: Jesus says, "you're welcome."

- I hear straining and grunting coming from the bathroom

Me: You doing OK in there, bud?

Cam (straining) I'm doing great!

- Encouraging him to change into nicer clothes for Rachel's graduation party

Me: We're going to a party so we should look nice.

Cam: But Mommy! They will like my Ninja Turtle shirt because it's nice and cool and cozy!

- Called kayaking, "kay-cocking"

- Calls Trader Joes, "the store with the baby carts."

Take Luck,

LP



Camden Says / 06

I swear.  The things this kid comes up with just slay me.  Me and probably only me.

Reading his Washington ABC's book before bed.

Me: M is for (wooly) mammoth.

Cam: No, Mommy.  It's a mastodon.

(thank you, Bubble Guppies)

Ryan trying to encourage Camden to give me a compliment.

Ryan: (whispers) say, "Mommy, you're beautiful!" really loud.

Cam: Mommy, you're beautiful really loud!

In the car on Zoey's first day of daycare.

Me: Buddy, I want you to protect your baby sister and take care of her today if she's sad.  Can you help take care of her for me?

Cam: No, Mommy.  Ms. Debbie do it.

Turning on a play computer at daycare.

Cam: Hold on, I need my gwasses (glasses).

After Ryan found the lost iPad.

Cam: Thank you, Daddy.  You a sweet boy.

On our way to the doctor.

Cam: Where we going, Mommy?

Me: We are going to see Dr. Bronald!

Cam: Oh.  Where is Broctor Donald?

Hear's Zoey crying on the monitor after she woke up from a painfully short nap.

Cam: Mommy!  Baby Zoey crying!

Me: (trying to fold the last bit of laundry) I hear her buddy.

Cam: Go get her!!

(Cam and I go upstairs)

Cam: It's ok Baby Zo Zo.  We here.

Picked Cam up from daycare right as school-aged kids were getting off the school bus and he was very upsets that he didn't get to ride the school bus too.  Called my parents to report on the kids' day.

Cam: (hysterically crying)

Dad: What's wrong with my grandson?

Cam: (hysterical crying)

Me: He wanted to get on the school bus so he's not very happy right now.

Cam: (stops crying) Yes, I am!

Talking about best friends.

Cam: Mommy, you my best friend.

Me: (speechless because my heart skipped a beat and then melted) I am?!!!

Cam: Yeah!  And Bastian my best friend.  And Amber my best friend.  And Maddy my best friend.

Me: 

In the elevator at the hotel in Hawaii, a Japanese woman bent down and spoke to him in Japanese.

Cam: What?! (emphasis on the T)

Also in the elevator at the hotel, he would strike up a conversation with any other people in there with us.

Cam: Hi!

Person: Hi, how are you?

Cam: I'm good.  I got swimming.  How you doin'?

If we were ever in the elevator alone.

Cam: There are no peoples in here.

In Hawaii and continuing his fascination with cities.

Me: What city are we in?

Cam: Honowuwu

A typical conversation in the car on the way to daycare.

Cam: I wike (like) sharks!

Me: I like sharks too!

Cam: I wike whales!

Me: I like whales too!

Cam: I wike polar bears!

Me: I like polar bears too!

Cam: I wike basketballs!

Learning the months of the year.

Cam: Januwawy (January), Febuwaway (February), March, June, Juwy (July), August, September, October, Novemberrrrrrrr!

Me: What about December?

Cam: 

Me: When is your birthday?

Cam: December ewebenth (eleventh)!

Hearing me use Siri to voice dial Ryan.

Me: Call Hubby.

Cam: One hubby, two hubby's, awotta (alotta) hubby's!

Talking about daycare/preschool friend's birthday that was celebrated.

Cam: Mommy, I want a present!

Me: What kind of present do you want?

Cam: A big one!

After Ryan buzzed his head for the second time.

Cam: (sees hair on the bathroom counter) Oh, no!  My hairs!

Talking about colors:

Me: What's your favorite color?

Cam: Blue cars.

Being a rascal in the car.

Cam: (removes socks and shoes, throws one sock at me while I'm driving)

Me: Please do not throw socks.

Cam: (throws second sock)

Me:

Cam: I'm funny.

Until next time.  And you know there will be a next time.

Take Luck,

LP

Camden Says / 05

I swear that within two days of hitting "publish" on my last Camden Says, my little man had already given me enough material for another post.  Alas, I restrained myself.  Until now.

When trying to be helpful and put Zoey's pacifier in her mouth.

Cam: Open your mowf (mouth)!

When he doesn't see Zoey.

Cam: Where my baby Zoey go?

When laying in bed with him before saying goodnight.

Cam: Snuggle with you, Mommy?

After our lone rain storm of the summer.

Cam: Daddy turn off the rain?

Me: (confused) No, buddy.

Cam: Oh.

Getting frustrated with Zoey's lack of verbal skills.

Cam: Guess what baby Zoey?

Zoey:

Cam: (a little louder) Guess what baby Zoey?!!

Zoey:

Cam: (now yelling) Guess what baby Zoeyyyyyy?!!!!

Knows his name.

Grammy: Sorry, Charlie.

Cam: I not Charlie, I Camden.  Charlie is a train!

Me: What's your name?

Cam: Camden James Peters!

Me: What's your baby sister's name?

Cam: Baby Zoey Grace Peters!

Squatting, grunting, with a beet red face.

Me: Cam, are you going poo poo?

Cam: No!

Me: Are you sure?

Cam: No wook (look) at me, Mommy!

Learning to use scissors at daycare and telling me about the rules.

Cam: Ms. Debbie say, "No cutting hairs. Only peepers (papers)."

Likes to shake your hand and say, "Nice to meechu (meet you)."

I opened the door and came out of the bathroom (where Camden had been standing outside, knocking and yelling for the duration).

Cam: Mommy!  What you doing, Mommy?!

Me:

Cam: Mommy!  What you doing, Mommy?!

Me: I went potty.

Cam: (clapping) Good job, Mommy!

Talking about his Uncle Josh.

Cam: (something I couldn't understand) Uncle Josh.

Me: You like Uncle Joshy, huh?

Cam: I wike (like) peanut butter, too!

I came downstairs for our anniversary dinner in a dress.

Cam: Mommy, you a princess!

Always asking about his Papa.

Cam: Where's my Papa?

Me: I think he's at the gym!

Cam: He's at gymnastics?

Whenever Zoey spits up.

Cam: Oh, no.  She spit over.

Anytime Huck called him "Griffin."

Cam: I'm not Griffin.  I'm Camden.

Snuggling in bed and he bonked my eyebrow with his head.

Me: Ouch!

Cam: What happened?!

Me: You bonked my eyebrow with your head and it hurt.

Cam: Awww, that's very sad.  I sorry, Mommy.

Taking his uneaten mini muffin from him when we arrived at daycare.

Me: Are you done?

Cam: Yes.

Me: (takes muffin)

Cam: Do not throw it in the bushes!

Me: (confused) I'm going to save it for you for later, buddy.

Cam: OK. Do not throw it in the waters!

Anytime you ask him if he wants to do something (i.e. swim lessons, the park, indoor play center with bouncy house, Grammy and Papa's).

Cam: Ohh, that's very fun.

Take Luck,

LP

Camden Says / 04

It's time for another installment of Camden Says.

As usual, I also completely recognize and accept that I may be the lone person on this earth that finds this to be funny.

Me: Are you my big boy?

Cam: No, I Camden.

 When he doesn't know what to say he'll say any of the following, leaving whoever he's talking to (usually a random person) very confused:

- Broom snapped in two!

- Dragon breathes fire out his mowf (mouth)!

- I saw polar bear at Ms. Debbie's!

- Big bad wolf is coming!

Days after Zoey was born, I was holding her and saying goodnight to him.

Me: Say goodnight to baby sister, too!

Cam: (leans over and puts his face into my tummy) goodnight baby sister!

While Ryan's parents were visiting I was feeding Zoey in our bedroom with the door shut.

Me: (hears knocking of a little person) come on in, buddy!

Cam: (attempts to open closed door by turning handle)

Me: Can you open it?!

Cam: No, Mommy!  It's clocked!

While playing with trains with my mother-in-law.

Cam: Mommy!

Me: Yeah, buddy?!

Cam: Hold on, I talking to Grandma.

Recently I went into his room when he woke up and as soon as I opened the door he proudly proclaimed "I have four poops, Mommy!" and held up five fingers.

Seeing me use the breast pump for the first time.

Cam: What's that, Mommy?

Me: It's a pump.

Cam: For the car?

Me: (long pause) Yes.

He likes to go with me to check the mail.  Recently we opened the mailbox to find a package from Old Navy inside.  He grabbed the bag and thought they were "chips!"

Reading a book at bedtime the other night that had a buoy in it.  He pointed to the picture and asked what it was.

Cam: What's that, Mommy?

Me: It's a buoy!

Cam: No, it's a ding dong!

When the sun is shining in his eyes while riding in the car he yells, "Stop it, sun!"

Other random things that come out of his mouth:

- The dragon (or dinosaur or shark) bite my finger (or toe or other random body part)

- Dream about Mommy? (Asking me what I dreamt about)

- I hold her, Mommy?

- Hi, baby girl (talking to Zoey in a super high pitched voice)

- Hold on, Mommy

- Yes, it is (very matter of fact, complete with his little lisp)

- Calls M&Ms "emmy ems"

- She so pretty, Mommy (talking to Zoey, sometimes calling her "he")

- No take nap!  No go bed!

Take Luck,

LP

Twins?

Today was an interesting one.

I was walking down the stairs to leave my building, with two men walking in front of me.  I made it to the platform when one of the men turned around, made eye contact with me, looked down at my tummy, and said, "Wow, are you having twins?!"

 I would like to state that I know this guy (let's call him Dan), and am not Dan's biggest fan.  He's an arrogant chump in his mid-50's and I find him incredibly obnoxious on both a personal and professional level.  I know I'm getting bigger (hell, I should be at 38 weeks), and honestly could give two hoots about Dan and what he has to say, but Dan is a good 50 pounds overweight and really has no business criticizing or commenting on anyone else's body.

Given that I cannot seem to leave my desk without someone making a comment about my pregnancy or body, you can imagine how a comment/question like, "Wow, are you having twins?!" might push me over the edge.

I'm proud (really proud) to say that instead of shying away and awkwardly laughing off the comment, our conversation went like this:

Dan: Wow, are you having twins?!

Me: Who the hell asks a pregnant woman that question?

Dan: (blank stare) Uhhhh...

Me: No, seriously.  Not cool.

Dan: Well, I haven't seen you in a while and you've gotten a lot bigger.

Me: Yes, well, that's what happens when you are a week from your due date.

Dan: (total insincere and thinking he's hilarious) It's been 20 years since my wife was pregnant.  I'm sorry I just shouldn't say anything.

Me: Yes, exactly.

Thankfully we were walking out of the building and to our vehicles during this conversation so I didn't have to make eye contact.  Otherwise I would have totally lost my nerve, responded with something only mildly sarcastic, and spent the drive to daycare thinking about what I should have said.  Instead, I got in my car, did a little fist pump and was really proud of myself for telling 'ol Dan exactly what I thought of his comment/question.

My only regret was that I didn't respond to "Wow, are you having twins?!" with "No, are you?" and walked off like a badass.

Source

Take Luck,

LP

Camden Says / 03

I know I am completely biased and think the sun shines out of his cute little tooshy, but I knew I had to document another edition of Camden Says before I am sleep deprived and incapable of remembering the funny things my man cub says.

I also completely recognize and accept that I may be the lone person on this earth that finds these little gems to be funny.

Me: What's your name?

Cam: Camden

Me: Camden?

Cam: Yeah, Camden Wobin (Robin) Hood

- Calls his soccer uniform his "unicorn"

- Early one morning...

Cam: Nose wunning (running), mommy

Me: Do you want me to wipe it?

Cam: (inserts finger into nostril) Wook (look), mommy.  A booby.

- Speaking of boobies, this child is obsessed.  Anytime his (or Ryan's) shirt is off...

Cam: (counting boobies) One.  Two.  Two boobies!

And if he has a shirt on and (heaven forbid) he can't see his boobies...

Cam: Where my boobies go?

- After catching a whiff of a familiar aroma, I checked his diaper by peeking in the back and asking "Cam, did you go poo poo?"  He said no and I visually verified that he had not.  Not two minutes later, he went over to Ryan, grabbed at the back of his pants waistband and said, "Daddy, go poo poo?"

- He takes certain rules very seriously (especially those involving pushing, hitting, spitting, biting, and throwing toys), so we hear a lot of "No pushing/hitting/spitting/biting/throwing, Mommy/Daddy," even if those things didn't actually happen.  He doesn't understand that light bottom taps (hitting) and blowing raspberries (spitting and/or biting) are forms of playing and will not hesitate to put you in timeout if you do either to him.

- After a biting incident at daycare (he was the biter) that was brought on by his personal space being invaded (not an excuse, I promise you), we talked to him about what to say when and if someone is touching you and you do not want to be touched - "Please do not touch me, (insert name)."  He repeated it several times to us and then Ryan put his hand on his back and without missing a beat, Cam said, "Please do not touch me, Daddy!"

- When the sun is out he will proclaim, "Thank you, Jesus for the sun!"  This is definitely something he learned at daycare.

- I caught him praying (with his hands folded and eyes closed) in the car recently and he said, "Mommy, Daddy, Zoey, Amen."

- In the car, jamming out to Sir Elton John on the radio...

Me: Cam, can you say, 'Elton John'?

Cam: Elmo John!

- Learning and practicing baby sister's name...

Me: Cam, what is baby sister's name going to be?

Cam: Amboomeps (ambulance)

- Randomly came home from daycare last week and started repeating over and over (and over and over to literally anyone that will listen)...

Cam: I saw (a) polar bear at Ms. Debbie's!

- Last weekend when my cousin, Cheryl, took our maternity/family photos, we talked the entire way to the ferry terminal about how Cheryl was going to get in our car and Cheryl was going to take our pictures.  He was repeating her name and asking "Where Cheryl go?" over and over.  She no sooner gets in the car and Cam started calling her "Miss Tricia" and he called her "Miss Tricia" for the entire time we were together.

Take Luck,

LP

The Easter Bunny

For tradition's sake, I decided to inflict torture on my sweet child again and we went to see the Easter Bunny yesterday.

I can't believe I didn't dedicate an entire post to last year's visit given the gem of a picture we came home with.

Anyway, I picked Hammy up from daycare, changed him out of his play clothes and into somewhat respectable clothes, and we met my mom at the mall.  There were a few families in line ahead of us, and there was only one employee taking photos and collecting payment, so it was moving rather slow.  I figured it would be ok to wait a little while, so he could watch the creepy bunny interact with other kids before it was our turn.  

We stood there, Camden waving and saying "hi" to the bunny, and telling me and Grammy what he wanted in his Easter basket.  For the record, he wants "trains, cars, bubbles, and coloring."  Not necessarily coloring books or crayons.  Just coloring.  Every so often we would ask him if he was excited and ready to sit with the Easter Bunny and he would initially nod yes, but then quickly shake his head no.

Our turn was up and much like his experience at meeting Pluto at Disneyland, he turned into Catatonic Camden and I knew we were in trouble.  I tried sitting with him to get him to stop ugly crying, but it was no use.

I really can't say that I blame the poor kid.  The bunny is super creepy.

Does it make me a bad person/parent that I was pretty confident he would react the way he did, yet I still took him?  Maybe, don't answer that.  I was comforted that he was fine once he was off the perch and wanted to see his picture.  My mom and I praised him and then got him a free spoonful of vanilla ice cream from Baskin Robbins (even though he requested "pancake" when asked what flavor he wanted).

Let's compare this year's photo with last year's.  Because honestly, who doesn't love a good comparison photo?  

I'd say he was slightly less terrified this year and fell more into the betrayal ("I thought you loved me?!") category.

It's hard to believe that next year we have the potential for two crying kids on the Easter Bunny.

Take Luck,

LP

Camden Says / 02

Considering I can hardly keep a thought in my head for longer than six seconds, and it's been a while since I last regaled you with things Camden says, I figure there is no time better than now to share some more.
 

- Ryan swatted/patted Camden's bottom while playing.  Cam whipped around, pointed his finger at Ryan and very sternly said, "Daddy, no hitting!"

- Whenever we're upstairs he likes to jump on the futon and look out the window.  One day he was looking out the window and said, "Mommy, wook (look)!  Boats!  Trees!  Waters!  Brock poop!"

- Says, "Come on, Mommy.  Mommy, come on!" about 12,000 times per day.

- Asking him what he did one particular day at daycare...

Me: What did you do today at Ms. Debbie's?

Cam: Uhm, twees (trees) fall down.

Me: You watched the men cut down the trees?

Cam: Uhm, yeah.  Twees cwying (crying).

- While playing trains, he let out a toot, grinned really big, and then innocently asked me, "Mommy, what that noise?"

- He loves to identify things as daddy, mommy, or baby.  For example, the handicapped school bus is always the "baby school bus," and any regular sized vessel is the "daddy school bus" or the "mommy school bus."

- They sing a lot of songs at daycare and he is always requesting that we sing "Whole World" in the car.  He's asking for "He's Got the Whole World in His Hands," and he will name all of this daycare teachers and most of his friends so we can sing for them.  And sometimes, he even wants to sing for "Baby Sister."  Swoon!

- Recently discovered Frozen/Olaf and asks to hear "Owaf (Olaf), Happy Snowman!"

- I could be driving any speed and he will randomly say, "Mommy, swow (slow) down!  Too fast!"

And my personal favorite...

- Changing his diaper one morning right after he woke up.  While trying to put his little britches back on, he held my face/chin in his hand and very seriously said, "Wook at me, Mommy.  Timeout?"

Take Luck,

LP

Mind Reading

Do you ever wish you could read someone's mind?  Sometimes I find myself wishing I could read Ryan's mind - but that's usually if he's being quiet or not super forthcoming with thoughts and feelings.  Cam is very verbal (which I've said probably 17 too many times now) so I usually have a pretty good idea of the very random things that pop in and out of his head.  But there are times when he is quiet, playing independently, looking mischievous, or throwing a tantrum that I wish I could read his little mind.

 I would imagine his little mind looks a little something like this:

I'm thirsty.

Milk sounds good.

No, water.

Definitely water.

But maybe milk?

A,B,C...

What that noise?

Let's go outside.

My mom just opened the door.

Nevermind.

Let's stay inside.

I have a basketball hoop.

I'll shoot this ball.

No, not that ball.

That ball is stupid and yellow so I will throw it on the ground.

I'll shoot the blue ball instead.

I missed.

Wook!  Trains!

Choo choo!

I will push James's button so he chugs on his own.

I haven't pulled Sonny's tail in a while.

That bookcase looks like it would be fun to climb.

Is my mom watching?

Of course she is.

Where did James go?

Maybe he had to go in the bathroom.

Wook!  A plunger!

I would like to wash my hands.
But without soap.
And without water.
No body understands me.

What do I need to do to get a snack?

I definitely would like some milk.

No, water.

So, about that snack.

Z-bar?  
Yes, please.

But not that half. 

The other half.

Santa song, please.

No, stop!

Reindeer song.

I'm tired.

Me too, buddy.  Me too.

Does this sound about right?  I don't have it down to an exact science yet but I'm pretty sure each thought lasts about 2.5 seconds.

Take Luck,

LP

Camden Says / 01

Every mother thinks their kid is cute and hilarious. I am no exception. 

Cam is pretty chatty. I'm amused by both the things he comes up with and how he says certain words. My hope is that some day he will be on the same level as Julia Patton. Although, this girl sets the bar mighty high. 

Talking about the baby in my belly...

Cam: (lifts up my shirt) Hi, baby!

Cam: (points to belly) Baby poo poo.

Cam: (pulls shirt back down) Baby cold. Brr! 

Trying to get him to get in the car to run an errand...

Me: Let's get in the car!

Cam: I drive!

Me: Uh, not today buddy.

Cam: Ok. Seat belts!

If he really wants to watch a movie or show and is denied, he will cock his head to the side and continue to repeat his request (and throw new ones out there in hopes that we will say yes) in a much higher-pitched voice than he normally speaks. "Bubble? Dora? Thomas? Movie? Monsters?" 

Anytime we are driving through a heavily wooded area he calls it the "rainfowest (rainforest)."

Hears any noise that he wasn't expecting....

Cam: (whips head around) What that noise?

During diaper or clothes changes he always asks for "wotion (lotion)" and says "I eat it. Dewicious (delicious)." I oblige his request with a small dab of lotion on his palm and say "Do not eat it. It is not delicious. It just smells delicious." And then he scrunches up his face when he "eat it" and it is indeed NOT dewicious. 

They must be praying at daycare because at dinner time last night he folded his hands, put his head down on the table (literally) and said, "Mommy, Daddy, Jesus, Amen."

Loves brushing his teeth - especially at bedtime. He asks for his "teepbrush  (toothbrush)" and his "poopaste (toothpaste)."

I cannot make this stuff up people. 

Cam has also started to tell me to "go away."  This is usually when I'm trying to get him to eat more breakfast/lunch/dinner.  For the record I do not find this cute or funny.  Just heartbreaking.

Take Luck,

LP

Stuff My Two Year Old Says

I still can't believe that Camden is two.  I've talked a lot about how much he talks, but the things that are coming out of his mouth lately are a hoot.  I may be slightly biased because I am his adoring mother, and I may be the only one that finds these funny.  Regardless, I need to document.

- Sings Jingle Bells as "Jingle Balls."

- Will yell, "No! Stop!" (with his hand held out emphasizing his desire for you to stop) when you are singing a song he doesn't like.

- Sometimes if both Ryan and I are in the car and trying to sing a song to/with him, he will yell, "Guys! Guys!"  Also an indication that he would like us to stop.

- Very recently started requesting "shake shake," when in the car.  It took me awhile to figure out what the heck "shake shake" meant but it finally dawned on me that he wanted to hear Taylor Swift's "Shake it Off."  He especially likes the "mmmm hmmm's."

- Will point and ask "What's that?" literally 25 times over the course of each book you read to him.  Try ignoring the question and he will just keep pointing and asking.

- Apparently knows how to sing "Twinkle Twinkle Little Star."

- Woke up from an epic three and a half hour nap on Friday and I asked him how he slept.  Expecting him to say, "Good," he shocked me when he said, "I wun (run) fast!  I swing wope (rope)!"  I think he was dreaming about gymnastics class.

- I had the audacity to close the bathroom door while trying to pee in privacy and he was standing on the other side, knocking, saying, "Knock knock, Mommy!"

- Trips or falls down and will say, "You're ok!" (instead of "I'm ok!")  Wonder where he's heard that?

Aside from the tantrums (most of which I don't even think he knows why he's upset) and newfound defiance - I am loving this age.  For now.

Take Luck,

LP

My Super Power

I've decided that I have a super power.  A gift, if you will.

My super power?

Picking the absolute worst line while checking out at a grocery store, or any store that may present a patron with multiple exit-upon-payment options.

This gift of mine used to be funny.  Ryan would laugh at my ability to continually choose the worst/slowest line possible.  I'm afraid to say that this tendency of mine is leaving the funny zone and been given a shove into annoying and incredibly irritating.

Let me enlighten you.

Sunday at Fred Meyer to do our weekly shopping with my shopping cart buddy who was done sitting in the seat.  I spot a family friendly line where there's only one couple, and they are checking out with several hanger plants.  Super.  I unload the masses from my cart onto the conveyer belt whilst holding my Hammy Cammy with my other arm.  I'm in a good rhythm when the belt stops full.  The coupon the woman had for her hanging planters wasn't registering and so the cashier was having to call back to the nursery.  Could the problem be solved over the phone?  Of course not.  

The customer attempted to make idle chit chat with me while we waited.  She laughed about the fact that she wasn't missing out on saving $7.50 and I did my best fake laugh while wiping the sweat from my forehead.

Eighteen minutes later it was our turn.  That's an exaggeration but with a wiggly toddler it felt like for-ev-er.

Yesterday I stopped at Safeway after work to pick up doughnuts for Ryan to take to his new 6pm-6am work shift.  I quickly selected an assortment of doughnuts, considered stuffing one in my mouth right then and there, and proceeded to the checkout.  Shocked at the number of lanes open, I chose an express lane with one couple in line and a bunch of cases of soda in their cart.  The stars seemed to align.  The cashier asked the customer if they had a Safeway Club Card and after much internal though and reflection, she declared that she did not.  He offered her one, she agreed and proceeded to fill out the damn paperwork right there on the spot.  

I'm not kidding when I say I covered my mouth with my wallet in order to keep from yelling some sort of expletives.

Last week at Target.  The lady in front of me forgot her wallet.  This was established after she emptied the entire contents of her purse out onto the counter.

Two weeks ago at Fred Meyer.  The lady in front of me was arguing over a competitor coupon and whether or not she was purchasing the exact same advertised item.  She wasn't, but the way, and insisted to speak to a manager.

Is this problem and these examples really a big deal?  Hell no.  But they happen all the frigging time.  I cannot make this stuff up.  I'm hardly ever in a true hurry, it's just the principal that this always happens that is stirring me into a dramatic frenzy.

Clearly I need a new strategy for selecting check out lanes.

Do you have this problem?  Or is this truly a magical super power that I possess?

Take Luck,

LP

First World Problems

We randomly lost power for about an hour Sunday night.  Not sure what happened - it wasn't windy and we didn't hear any boom/explosion to indicate a transformer had blown, so we reported the outage to the electrical company and waited.

The really sad part, is how crystal clear it became that randomly losing power for an hour is truly a first world problem.

Why?

The first thing I did was check my phone to see the time.  I wanted to make sure that it was past 7:00pm and that the outage wouldn't affect the DVR recording of The Walking Dead season finale.

Source

Ryan was in the middle of a fantasy baseball draft so of course, our wireless modem stopped working.  After several huffs and choice words (and because I'm such a thoughtful wife) I suggested using my iPhone as a personal hotspot so he could continue.

I then sat on pins and needles as my already "low battery" phone dwindled down below 10%.

Finally, I worried that the outage, causing Camden's sound machine and night light to turn off, would wake him up.  So, naturally I turned on the video monitor to see if he was awake............... I bet you can guess how much visual evidence was on the other end of that monitor.

Seriously, what is wrong with me?

Take Luck,

LP