To the Dentist

Because I didn't want to go to Camden's 3-year well check up in a few weeks and continue to tell his pediatrician that he hadn't seen the dentist yet... I scheduled a "happy visit" appointment for the little bugger two weeks ago.

Like an idiot, I scheduled his appointment for 1:00pm - just saying "OK!" to the first appointment time the receptionist threw out at me.  Normally, I wouldn't have missed a beat and said, "sorry, no - that's during nap time."  But for whatever reason - I had a momentary lapse in judgement and didn't really realize what I had done until the day before.

Since he's been waking up at the ass crack of dawn the past several weeks, I knew I could get away with putting him down for an early nap.  But I also knew that would mean having to wake him up from said nap.  I shudder just thinking about it.

I woke him up at the last possible second and he cried the entire drive to the dentist.

Strike one.

We get to the office and he immediately calms down at the sight of a train puzzle and soon after says he has to go potty.  I'm excited by this because it means that (hopefully) we'll get through his dental appointment without having to excuse ourselves.

He sits on the potty and then starts to move around, trying to get "comfortable" on his new perch (since he's used to the potty seat) and he immediately falls in the toilet.  Cam's scream-crying and I'm laughing.  I can only imagine what the receptionists heard at this point.  No doubt he upped the dramatics thanks to being woken up from his nap.

Strike two.

Right now I'm thinking, "we should just cut our losses and leave.  I am just asking for trouble."

Camden gets called back and the sweet lady asked him if he wanted to sit in the robot chair and meet some new friends.  He was intrigued and while wearing some super cool sunglasses, got to meet Mr. Sunshine (the light), Mr. Thirsty (the sucker), Mr. Squirter (the water), and Mr. Spinner (the polisher).

The treatment coordinator introduced Cam to all his new friends then polished and brushed some fluoride on a few teeth.  The dentist checked and counted his teeth and looked at his bite, and we were all done.  A happy visit indeed!  I didn't strike out!

There was no pressure or fear whatsoever and it was a really good first dentist visit for my little dude.  I had to go back this past Monday to get a cavity filled and he said he wanted to go with me.

Let's hope his next visit goes just as well.  And he keeps his heiny out of the toilet.

Take Luck,

LP

Camden Says / 06

I swear.  The things this kid comes up with just slay me.  Me and probably only me.

Reading his Washington ABC's book before bed.

Me: M is for (wooly) mammoth.

Cam: No, Mommy.  It's a mastodon.

(thank you, Bubble Guppies)

Ryan trying to encourage Camden to give me a compliment.

Ryan: (whispers) say, "Mommy, you're beautiful!" really loud.

Cam: Mommy, you're beautiful really loud!

In the car on Zoey's first day of daycare.

Me: Buddy, I want you to protect your baby sister and take care of her today if she's sad.  Can you help take care of her for me?

Cam: No, Mommy.  Ms. Debbie do it.

Turning on a play computer at daycare.

Cam: Hold on, I need my gwasses (glasses).

After Ryan found the lost iPad.

Cam: Thank you, Daddy.  You a sweet boy.

On our way to the doctor.

Cam: Where we going, Mommy?

Me: We are going to see Dr. Bronald!

Cam: Oh.  Where is Broctor Donald?

Hear's Zoey crying on the monitor after she woke up from a painfully short nap.

Cam: Mommy!  Baby Zoey crying!

Me: (trying to fold the last bit of laundry) I hear her buddy.

Cam: Go get her!!

(Cam and I go upstairs)

Cam: It's ok Baby Zo Zo.  We here.

Picked Cam up from daycare right as school-aged kids were getting off the school bus and he was very upsets that he didn't get to ride the school bus too.  Called my parents to report on the kids' day.

Cam: (hysterically crying)

Dad: What's wrong with my grandson?

Cam: (hysterical crying)

Me: He wanted to get on the school bus so he's not very happy right now.

Cam: (stops crying) Yes, I am!

Talking about best friends.

Cam: Mommy, you my best friend.

Me: (speechless because my heart skipped a beat and then melted) I am?!!!

Cam: Yeah!  And Bastian my best friend.  And Amber my best friend.  And Maddy my best friend.

Me: 

In the elevator at the hotel in Hawaii, a Japanese woman bent down and spoke to him in Japanese.

Cam: What?! (emphasis on the T)

Also in the elevator at the hotel, he would strike up a conversation with any other people in there with us.

Cam: Hi!

Person: Hi, how are you?

Cam: I'm good.  I got swimming.  How you doin'?

If we were ever in the elevator alone.

Cam: There are no peoples in here.

In Hawaii and continuing his fascination with cities.

Me: What city are we in?

Cam: Honowuwu

A typical conversation in the car on the way to daycare.

Cam: I wike (like) sharks!

Me: I like sharks too!

Cam: I wike whales!

Me: I like whales too!

Cam: I wike polar bears!

Me: I like polar bears too!

Cam: I wike basketballs!

Learning the months of the year.

Cam: Januwawy (January), Febuwaway (February), March, June, Juwy (July), August, September, October, Novemberrrrrrrr!

Me: What about December?

Cam: 

Me: When is your birthday?

Cam: December ewebenth (eleventh)!

Hearing me use Siri to voice dial Ryan.

Me: Call Hubby.

Cam: One hubby, two hubby's, awotta (alotta) hubby's!

Talking about daycare/preschool friend's birthday that was celebrated.

Cam: Mommy, I want a present!

Me: What kind of present do you want?

Cam: A big one!

After Ryan buzzed his head for the second time.

Cam: (sees hair on the bathroom counter) Oh, no!  My hairs!

Talking about colors:

Me: What's your favorite color?

Cam: Blue cars.

Being a rascal in the car.

Cam: (removes socks and shoes, throws one sock at me while I'm driving)

Me: Please do not throw socks.

Cam: (throws second sock)

Me:

Cam: I'm funny.

Until next time.  And you know there will be a next time.

Take Luck,

LP

Potty Training {Day Four}

Warning: This post is allllll about potty training.  Stop reading if you don't want to hear about my kid's bodily functions.  I'm writing this mainly so I can document progress and have something to look back on when we go down the potty training road with Zoey.

I know, I know.  I said that yesterday's recap would be my last.  But you guys - he's got it.

I was up with Zoey at 5:00 to nurse and had a hard time getting her to fall back asleep.  I had set my alarm for 6:00 so I could be awake before my little potty trainer.  Well, thank you Zoey, because the little man was awake at 6:00 on the dot, sitting at his door in a heavily wetted pull up chanting "Mommaaay!  Mommaaaaaaay!"

I retrieved him from his chambers and escorted him to the potty, but nothing.  I wasn't expecting anything but wanted to try so he knows that's what you do right after you wake up.

Two hours went by without any - no successes and no accidents and I was getting worried that he starting to rebel or something.  He finally went and I breathed a huge sigh of relief that maybe he was in fact "getting it."  He even pooped on the potty again!  Ryan has taught him to "shake off" the last of the pee once he's done and I'm not even kidding he sings "shake it off" to the tune of his favorite lady singer, Taylor Swift.

Ryan buzzed his head again and it was less traumatizing for me this time, thank God.  Afterwards I gave him a bath (where he promptly peed in the drain, and I counted that as a success!) and after that he insisted on running around the house in his "shark cape."

He went down for his nap (in a pull up) no problem and knocked my socks off when he woke up and it was dry.  Not only that but when I took him down to potty right after he woke up - he peed!  The dry pull up could have totally been a fluke, but whatever - I celebrated him and the accomplishment.

A couple times today, after successes, I even heard himself say "Keep 'em dry, bud" (talking about his undies) - so he is actually listening after all.

Did I mention during any of this that following the 3 Day Potty Training method means not leaving your home for three days?  You can imagine how stir crazy we were all getting having this little tornado child cooped up for four days.

My parents just got a new kitten so I thought it would be a good test to go over there and see how he did in a 15 minute car ride there, a visit, and the ride home. 

I was a little nervous when he said he had to go potty twice before we even left our neighborhood.

We got to my parent's house without any incidents or accidents and once inside he kept a death grip on the sweet, innocent kitten... That he kept calling "Nicey."  Her name is Macy.  Poor Macy couldn't decide if she wanted to play with him or hide from him.  Cam loves going over to his Grammy and Papa's and was quite rambunctious while we were visiting and I know it was because he was so excited to be out of the house.

My mom got Zoey out of her carseat and almost immediately said, "I think she pooped."  Not only did she poop, but she blew out her diaper and had poo all over her pants and onesie.  Mother of the year over packed two extra undies and a pair of shorts for Camden but not a darn thing for the spit up and I'm-going-to-poop-in-my-carseat-so-it-goes-up-and-errrywhere queen.  My mom was able to salvage the onesie by way of baby wipes and a lot of baby powder.

After whacking his head on the door frame of their bathroom, a success pee on the potty, and bonking his head on the coffee table - I decided it was time to call it a win and get back home.

We got home and had dinner - the usual.  He had two more successes on the potty after we got home from Mom and Dad's.  His last prize blew his little mind - a glow stick.

He was pretty excited about it.

Dare I say "he's done it!"?  I don't know, but shoot - today he continually told us he had to go potty, had many successes, and no accidents.  Part of me wants to see how tomorrow goes with him being back at daycare before completely shouting it from the rooftops, but the other part of me wants to say "hell frigging yeah, he's (daytime) potty trained!!!!!!!!!!!!"

End of Day Four tally:

#1 Successes: 8

#1 Accidents: 0

#2 Successes: 1

#2 Accidents: 0

 

{Potty Training Day One}

{Potty Training Day Two}

{Potty Training Day Three}

If you're lucky (or is it unlucky?), I'll keep you posted on progress.  Let's just hope our daycare ladies follow our strategy and directions and that he doesn't completely undo all the progress we've made in the last four days.

Take Luck,

LP

Potty Training {Day Three}

Warning: This post is allllll about potty training.  Stop reading if you don't want to hear about my kid's bodily functions.  I'm writing this mainly so I can document progress and have something to look back on when we go down the potty training road with Zoey.

 

Today was not so great.  It wasn't bad, but it sure wasn't as good as yesterday - even from the get go.

I'm always awake before Cam and I assumed last night would be no different.  But aside from many trips to give Zoey her pacifier, she slept great last night - and I slept in a lot later than normal.  I was woken up at 6:30 by hearing Camden crying from his room and immediately felt a sense of dread/fear.  I went into his room and got him to the toilet to see he had a crazy full pull up, complete with poo.

Just the way we wanted to start our day.

I assured him that it wasn't his fault and that it was "mommy's fault."  I felt awful that I wasn't awake and prepared for him to wake up.  There's no way for me to know if that would have made a difference - but I'm really confident that it would have.

The morning got better after that.  Cam had a couple successes (and no accidents) while we watched the Seahawks game.  We could tell he was getting super restless and stir-crazy from being inside for the past two days, so I put some pants on him, took him outside for a little bike ride around the drive way "race track" and to play some soccer on the back deck.  In between "I gotta go potty's" of course!

Ryan put him down for his nap so I could go buy a used (and amazing) glider for Zoey's room and it sounds like Cam insisted on wearing a pair of his fleece footy pajamas because "I feel safe" wearing them.  Whatever, buddy.

Potty training must wear a guy out because he slept for three and a half hours and we had to wake him up from his dead-to-the-world-slumber.  No surprise that his pull up was pretty dang wet when he finally got up.

A ba-zillion more "Tell Mommy when you have to go potty's!" and "Keep 'em dry, buddy's!" later and he had a couple more successes and a couple accidents in the evening.  The accidents were really discouraging to me because he had done so well on Day Two and in the morning (aside from his early morning accident).  But I realize that this is still very new to him and overall, he's doing really well.  He had the first accident while watching the iPad - I told Ryan I didn't want him watching it while potty training because he starts watching Donald Duck (or the dreaded Surprise Egg videos) on YouTube and gets totally sucked in.  I'm not really sure why the second accident happened.  I was sitting right there playing trains with him and then all of a sudden I noticed he was peeing.

Anyway, it wasn't the greatest day - and certainly not how I thought our Day Three would go based on the success of yesterday.  Ryan and I are both off of work tomorrow for Columbus Day, so we'll take advantage of one more day of training before heading back to work and daycare on Tuesday.

End of Day Three tally:

#1 Successes: 5

#1 Accidents: 2

#2 Successes: 0

#2 Accidents: 1

Thankfully there were more successes than accidents, right?

{Potty Training Day One}

{Potty Training Day Two}

I'll spare you any updates after today and resume talking about other super important things in our life.  Ha.

Take Luck,

LP

Potty Training {Day Two}

Warning: This post is allllll about potty training.  Stop reading if you don't want to hear about my kid's bodily functions.  I'm writing this mainly so I can document progress and have something to look back on when we go down the potty training road with Zoey.

Today was great.

Cam woke up with a pretty wet pull up so I was glad we went that route.  No telling how many times I would have been up and down to help him and/or change his sheets - and let's be honest... I'm already up enough times with Zo Zo.

Part of my strategy has been to keep Cam as engaged and entertained as possible so it's easy for him to recognize that he needs to go to potty, tell us, stop what he's doing, and go.

On a side (and personal) note... This sounds awful but I have really loved how this process has forced me to be incredibly attentive to him.  It's not that I don't pay attention to him - because I absolutely do, but a lot of times I'm paying attention to him and interacting with him while trying to do some thing else (or sometimes multiple things).  The past two days have refreshing (and exhausting) and among other things - shown me that I can stand to put some of these other things aside and focus more of my undivided attention on these babies.

I saw a pin on Pinterest about putting paper and paint inside a Ziploc bag, taping it with masking tape to a table, and letting the child finger paint mess free!  I decided to give it a try today and he was interested in each bag for about two minutes.  But hey, that was four minutes of his day that he wasn't asking me to watch the iPad. 

The big highlight of the morning was when I was talking to my mom on the phone (half listening to her, half watching Cam like a hawk) and he said he had to go potty!  He's been amazing at telling us, but some times he sits down on the potty and almost immediately says "I'm all done" even though he didn't do anything.  I don't mind because although it's exhausting, I would much rather he was trying that having accidents.  Anyway, while talking to my mom I set him up on the toilet and a few seconds later I hear one big plop, followed by one little plop.

He frigging pooped on the potty and I was squealing with delight and pride!  He immediately peed and said he was "all done," so he got three M&Ms, a sticker of his choice on his chart, and a surprise egg.  A few minutes after his reward I realized he wasn't quite done peeing yet and had had a little, tiny accident, but again - he pooped on the potty and that was our focus.  That little accident went on to be his only accident of the day! 

Here's an example of the small toys/prizes that I've been putting in his reward surprise eggs - little Minion figurines from The Minion Movie.

After he woke up from his nap (with only a mildly wet pull up), we broke out his matchbox cars and we lined them up so they could go "shopping."

And then after we practiced counting his cars and sorting them by colors, Cam was happy to (pretend) demolish/destruct the cars with this monster truck. 

At bedtime he was really resisting wearing the pull up and just wanted to wear his undies, but again tonight I feel like it's in all of our best interests to wear the pull ups just for a little bit.  I'll re-evaluate if he continues to do well and resist.  He's a hard little sleeper and I just cannot see him waking up in the middle of the night to pee.

Today I probably said the phrases "Tell Mommy when you have to go potty!" "Are you dry?!" and "You're such a big boy!" about 300 times.  Each.  I mean - I'm annoying myself at this point but I really think it's helping him be successful.  So, I'll continue to annoy myself (and him, no doubt) for another day or two.  Tomorrow will be Day Three and I am so excited and proud of him.  It really seems like it's "clicking" for him and I hope tomorrow is another successful day.

End of Day Two tally:

#1 Successes: 9

#1 Accidents: 1

#2 Successes: 1

#2 Accidents: 0

I know, I know.  You can't wait for Day Three either.

{Potty Training Day One}

Take Luck,

LP

Potty Training {Day One}

Warning: This post is allllll about potty training.  Stop reading if you don't want to hear about my kid's bodily functions.  I'm writing this mainly so I can document progress and have something to look back on when we go down the potty training road with Zoey.

 

I decided to take advantage of a long weekend and dive head first into potty training Camden. I've been reading a lot about it and asking moms that have walked this road before me. Almost all said that with boys, it's best to let them lead and to not push it before they are ready.  

I felt like for the past several weeks, Cam has been showing signs of being ready, other than outwardly saying "I don't want to wear a diaper anymore."   He's been saying "don't change my diaper" after pooping, and immediately peeing in the drain of the bathtub on bath nights. Just this past Monday, he went pee on the potty for the first time. 

 

To me, he seemed ready. As ready as he is going to be, anyway. 

 

I bought and read the 3-Day Potty Training e-book and set off for Graceland, I mean, Target, for my supplies. 

 

I bought Thomas, Minion, and Superhero undies, stickers, m&m's, matchbox cars, light-up bouncy balls, and little Minion surprise bags. I may or may not have also bought some extra carpet cleaner.  Ya know, just in case.

 

I was excited. Like, so excited I was dreaming about potty training.

 

I woke up early to make sure everything was ready to start the morning off right and re-read Lora's method.  Basically, other than encouraging patience, consistency, praise/reward and love - she stresses not asking the child if they have to go potty, but that the parent tells the child "Tell Mommy when you have to go potty!" so they learn the cues/signals from their body and can then rush off to the bathroom.  She suggests asking the child if they're dry as a way to praise and acknowledge their success before they even get on the potty.  (So far, at the end of Day One, I really feel like both those approaches/techniques are really helping.)

 

As soon as he woke up this morning I was making a big deal about him being a big boy, not needing to wear diapers anymore, and getting to wear awesome undies.   He took my bait and chose the Superman undies first. I was shocked because I thought for suuuure he would chose Thomas. 

We started off strong with one successful pee on the potty. Soon after I could tell he needed to poop but was uncomfortable and anxious about doing it on the potty. I took him off and watched him very closely - and before long I could see that he was in his typical poop stance and ready. I scooped him up and rushed into the bathroom and was able to get it in the toilet. I hoped this would make him think he did it all himself and ease some of his anxiety. He peed in the potty again right after. 

It was time for nap and after many attempts of getting him to pee before laying down, he was resisting. The method I read said to put him down for naps and bed in his undies and to not use diapers or pull ups or anything! Ha. Well, I gave it a go and after many trips up and down the stairs - I couldn't get back up fast enough and he peed while waiting for me at his door. I waved my white flag and put him in a pull up because I was exhausted and knew he was too. 

He slept for two hours and I had to wake him up (because I never let him sleep past 4:00). It's always a double-edged sword. I wake him so he'll go to sleep but he's a complete grump. Anyway, Mister Grumpy was not happy with me and didn't want anything to do with the potty. This was evidenced by the four accidents he had over the course of the next hour. 

Ryan came home from work and I was overjoyed to have some backup.  I wasn't frustrated in the least bit - just exhausted, and poor Zoey was not getting very much of my attention because I was so focused on Cam.

The kid came back around and had two more successful pees in the potty in the evening.  Even though I washed off his legs after his accidents - the kid needed a good bath.

I didn't hesitate one second to put a pull up on him at bedtime.  The pull ups have Buzz Lightyear on them and he said "That's my Buzz Lightyear to the rescue?!"

 

As I was typing this I heard him upset and crying from his room.  I went in to see what the problem was and he had grabbed a pair of clean (but worn) undies out of his laundry basket and was sobbing "I need to wear dees!"  I'm not convinced he would keep those babies dry so I compromised and put them on over his pull up.

 

End of Day One tally:

#1 Successes: 4

#1 Accidents: 4

#2 Successes: 0

#2 Accidents: 1

Hoping for his typical good night's sleep and I'll be interested to see how wet his pull up is in the morning.

 

I bet you can't wait for tomorrow's update on Day Two.

Take Luck,

LP

Camden Says / 05

I swear that within two days of hitting "publish" on my last Camden Says, my little man had already given me enough material for another post.  Alas, I restrained myself.  Until now.

When trying to be helpful and put Zoey's pacifier in her mouth.

Cam: Open your mowf (mouth)!

When he doesn't see Zoey.

Cam: Where my baby Zoey go?

When laying in bed with him before saying goodnight.

Cam: Snuggle with you, Mommy?

After our lone rain storm of the summer.

Cam: Daddy turn off the rain?

Me: (confused) No, buddy.

Cam: Oh.

Getting frustrated with Zoey's lack of verbal skills.

Cam: Guess what baby Zoey?

Zoey:

Cam: (a little louder) Guess what baby Zoey?!!

Zoey:

Cam: (now yelling) Guess what baby Zoeyyyyyy?!!!!

Knows his name.

Grammy: Sorry, Charlie.

Cam: I not Charlie, I Camden.  Charlie is a train!

Me: What's your name?

Cam: Camden James Peters!

Me: What's your baby sister's name?

Cam: Baby Zoey Grace Peters!

Squatting, grunting, with a beet red face.

Me: Cam, are you going poo poo?

Cam: No!

Me: Are you sure?

Cam: No wook (look) at me, Mommy!

Learning to use scissors at daycare and telling me about the rules.

Cam: Ms. Debbie say, "No cutting hairs. Only peepers (papers)."

Likes to shake your hand and say, "Nice to meechu (meet you)."

I opened the door and came out of the bathroom (where Camden had been standing outside, knocking and yelling for the duration).

Cam: Mommy!  What you doing, Mommy?!

Me:

Cam: Mommy!  What you doing, Mommy?!

Me: I went potty.

Cam: (clapping) Good job, Mommy!

Talking about his Uncle Josh.

Cam: (something I couldn't understand) Uncle Josh.

Me: You like Uncle Joshy, huh?

Cam: I wike (like) peanut butter, too!

I came downstairs for our anniversary dinner in a dress.

Cam: Mommy, you a princess!

Always asking about his Papa.

Cam: Where's my Papa?

Me: I think he's at the gym!

Cam: He's at gymnastics?

Whenever Zoey spits up.

Cam: Oh, no.  She spit over.

Anytime Huck called him "Griffin."

Cam: I'm not Griffin.  I'm Camden.

Snuggling in bed and he bonked my eyebrow with his head.

Me: Ouch!

Cam: What happened?!

Me: You bonked my eyebrow with your head and it hurt.

Cam: Awww, that's very sad.  I sorry, Mommy.

Taking his uneaten mini muffin from him when we arrived at daycare.

Me: Are you done?

Cam: Yes.

Me: (takes muffin)

Cam: Do not throw it in the bushes!

Me: (confused) I'm going to save it for you for later, buddy.

Cam: OK. Do not throw it in the waters!

Anytime you ask him if he wants to do something (i.e. swim lessons, the park, indoor play center with bouncy house, Grammy and Papa's).

Cam: Ohh, that's very fun.

Take Luck,

LP

Camden Says / 04

It's time for another installment of Camden Says.

As usual, I also completely recognize and accept that I may be the lone person on this earth that finds this to be funny.

Me: Are you my big boy?

Cam: No, I Camden.

 When he doesn't know what to say he'll say any of the following, leaving whoever he's talking to (usually a random person) very confused:

- Broom snapped in two!

- Dragon breathes fire out his mowf (mouth)!

- I saw polar bear at Ms. Debbie's!

- Big bad wolf is coming!

Days after Zoey was born, I was holding her and saying goodnight to him.

Me: Say goodnight to baby sister, too!

Cam: (leans over and puts his face into my tummy) goodnight baby sister!

While Ryan's parents were visiting I was feeding Zoey in our bedroom with the door shut.

Me: (hears knocking of a little person) come on in, buddy!

Cam: (attempts to open closed door by turning handle)

Me: Can you open it?!

Cam: No, Mommy!  It's clocked!

While playing with trains with my mother-in-law.

Cam: Mommy!

Me: Yeah, buddy?!

Cam: Hold on, I talking to Grandma.

Recently I went into his room when he woke up and as soon as I opened the door he proudly proclaimed "I have four poops, Mommy!" and held up five fingers.

Seeing me use the breast pump for the first time.

Cam: What's that, Mommy?

Me: It's a pump.

Cam: For the car?

Me: (long pause) Yes.

He likes to go with me to check the mail.  Recently we opened the mailbox to find a package from Old Navy inside.  He grabbed the bag and thought they were "chips!"

Reading a book at bedtime the other night that had a buoy in it.  He pointed to the picture and asked what it was.

Cam: What's that, Mommy?

Me: It's a buoy!

Cam: No, it's a ding dong!

When the sun is shining in his eyes while riding in the car he yells, "Stop it, sun!"

Other random things that come out of his mouth:

- The dragon (or dinosaur or shark) bite my finger (or toe or other random body part)

- Dream about Mommy? (Asking me what I dreamt about)

- I hold her, Mommy?

- Hi, baby girl (talking to Zoey in a super high pitched voice)

- Hold on, Mommy

- Yes, it is (very matter of fact, complete with his little lisp)

- Calls M&Ms "emmy ems"

- She so pretty, Mommy (talking to Zoey, sometimes calling her "he")

- No take nap!  No go bed!

Take Luck,

LP

Camden Says / 03

I know I am completely biased and think the sun shines out of his cute little tooshy, but I knew I had to document another edition of Camden Says before I am sleep deprived and incapable of remembering the funny things my man cub says.

I also completely recognize and accept that I may be the lone person on this earth that finds these little gems to be funny.

Me: What's your name?

Cam: Camden

Me: Camden?

Cam: Yeah, Camden Wobin (Robin) Hood

- Calls his soccer uniform his "unicorn"

- Early one morning...

Cam: Nose wunning (running), mommy

Me: Do you want me to wipe it?

Cam: (inserts finger into nostril) Wook (look), mommy.  A booby.

- Speaking of boobies, this child is obsessed.  Anytime his (or Ryan's) shirt is off...

Cam: (counting boobies) One.  Two.  Two boobies!

And if he has a shirt on and (heaven forbid) he can't see his boobies...

Cam: Where my boobies go?

- After catching a whiff of a familiar aroma, I checked his diaper by peeking in the back and asking "Cam, did you go poo poo?"  He said no and I visually verified that he had not.  Not two minutes later, he went over to Ryan, grabbed at the back of his pants waistband and said, "Daddy, go poo poo?"

- He takes certain rules very seriously (especially those involving pushing, hitting, spitting, biting, and throwing toys), so we hear a lot of "No pushing/hitting/spitting/biting/throwing, Mommy/Daddy," even if those things didn't actually happen.  He doesn't understand that light bottom taps (hitting) and blowing raspberries (spitting and/or biting) are forms of playing and will not hesitate to put you in timeout if you do either to him.

- After a biting incident at daycare (he was the biter) that was brought on by his personal space being invaded (not an excuse, I promise you), we talked to him about what to say when and if someone is touching you and you do not want to be touched - "Please do not touch me, (insert name)."  He repeated it several times to us and then Ryan put his hand on his back and without missing a beat, Cam said, "Please do not touch me, Daddy!"

- When the sun is out he will proclaim, "Thank you, Jesus for the sun!"  This is definitely something he learned at daycare.

- I caught him praying (with his hands folded and eyes closed) in the car recently and he said, "Mommy, Daddy, Zoey, Amen."

- In the car, jamming out to Sir Elton John on the radio...

Me: Cam, can you say, 'Elton John'?

Cam: Elmo John!

- Learning and practicing baby sister's name...

Me: Cam, what is baby sister's name going to be?

Cam: Amboomeps (ambulance)

- Randomly came home from daycare last week and started repeating over and over (and over and over to literally anyone that will listen)...

Cam: I saw (a) polar bear at Ms. Debbie's!

- Last weekend when my cousin, Cheryl, took our maternity/family photos, we talked the entire way to the ferry terminal about how Cheryl was going to get in our car and Cheryl was going to take our pictures.  He was repeating her name and asking "Where Cheryl go?" over and over.  She no sooner gets in the car and Cam started calling her "Miss Tricia" and he called her "Miss Tricia" for the entire time we were together.

Take Luck,

LP

If You Give a Kid a Cupcake...

... He will go bat shit crazy.

I'm only sort of kidding and I'll tell you why.

This past weekend was kinda nutty.  Ryan had to work 8am-8pm on both Saturday and Sunday.  Odd shifts are far from ideal, but they are what they are and I try really hard not to complain.  At least not too much anyway.  As luck would have it, with Ryan at work and me 33 weeks pregnant, Camden decided to give me a real run for my money.

Saturday morning we had soccer and it was all fine and dandy.  Until class started.  Because I am compulsively early, we were there before the mob of 20 wild beasts (and their parents) gathered on the soccer field.  Cam was happy to run freely (wildly), pass the ball back and forth with me, and score goals.  My dad had come to watch and was standing out on the field with me when my Hammy decided he didn't so much want to participate.  Like at all.

For the next 45 minutes, he alternated between debating on participating, throwing himself on the turf, drinking his water, running away from us, picking up some of the obstacle course equipment and using them as (flying) weapons, and just generally doing the exact opposite of anything and everything I said.  I promise I'm not one of those parents that thinks their child is a perfect little angel (hello, I refer to him as a wild beast), but this behavior was really out of character for him.  We tried ignoring him, two-year old appropriate reverse psychology, and timeouts and none of it was helping or working.  He kept saying, "Go home?" and while part of me really, really wanted to get out of there and put us all out of our misery, the other part thought, "No, we're not going home, you little jerk face.  We are staying here."  More flailing, more defiance and I finally waved my little white flag, threw him over my shoulder (a sight, I am sure of it), and carried him off the field.  A screaming, kicking child, and a 33 week pregnant woman don't really mix, so my dear old daddy had the honor of taking over as chariot.

Thank goodness he napped well and wasn't a complete shit the rest of the day and evening, but he was close - totally sassy and testing my already low patience like it was going out of style.  We capped off the day with a trip to the park to "frow wocks."

Sunday morning he was in a super great mood.  We went to the grocery store nice and early (because that's what parents whose kids wake up at 6:15am on Sunday do), and he was my little helper.  He loves counting and putting produce into the plastic bags and then gently placing (ahem, throwing) them in the cart.  

We spent the rest of the morning playing trains, reading books, blowing bubbles, and FaceTiming with Ryan's parents.  Our friend's little boy, Alex, was having his third birthday party at a local park in the afternoon and it was going to work out "perfectly" with Camden's nap time.  I can hear God laughing at me as I type this, because I'll give you two guesses as to who decided it was a great day to spend an hour protesting his nap.  

Did you guess Camden?  Congratulations and don't mind my middle finger.  He finally fell asleep after he had some quality scream-crying time in his crib (don't judge) and then being rocked to sleep.  

I woke him up (I know!) and we ventured to the park.  He was very excited to go to the birthday party but not so excited to forfeit the present (four little Chuggington trains).  Thanks to the weather, the park was crazy crowded, but we found our people and I immediately helped myself to food while Camden was entertained by a bubble machine.  We spent some time playing on the playground, and then it was time for cupcakes and gifts.

Here's where it got really interesting.  We don't give Cam a whole lot of sugar.  Don't get me wrong - he eats his fair share of processed foods, but very, very rarely does he get sugary treats.  And I was reminded as to why.

I took about 90% of the frosting off of his cupcake and helped him eat it so not to make a total mess.  I should have videotaped his consumption because, dear lord - he inhaled it.  I should have known that a shit storm was looming.

We watched Alex open all his gifts and resumed playing on the playground until it was time to go.  My parents were at the Mariner game for my dad's birthday and they had asked if we would check on and feed their puppies for them so we needed to scoot.  Cam surprisingly left without a fuss and we drove to Grammy and Papa's.  We let the dogs out, he stepped in dog poo, and somehow the dog poo managed to find its way onto his shorts.  Fantastic.

Cara called me on FaceTime so Cam and I sat down in the living room to chat.  It was then that I started to wonder if the cupcake he consumed at the party was laced with crack.  Why?  Because during this FaceTime session, my child thought he was auditioning for toddler WWF/WWE and was repeatedly standing on a little red rocking chair and jumping onto me like a spider monkey.  Or Hulk Hogan.  I don't even know.  It was sort of funny at first and then he got this crazy look in his eye and (wait for it) picked up his toddler sized rocking chair and threw it at me.

It's beyond embarrassing but I mean seriously, people. 

Cara and I attempted to continue a conversation and failed miserably - both of us seriously distracted by our boys.  For the record, her boys were not throwing toddler-sized rocking chairs at her.  We finally gave in and ended the call, and I drove a pant and shoe-less Hammy home in relative silence, promising myself to never ever let him eat a cupcake again.

We got home, powered through the rest of the night, and I didn't even have to go in his room once to get him to lay back down in bed.  I think part of his little man self just knew that mommy was done.  Ryan got home just after 8pm and asked how my day was.  The tears immediately started flowing and somehow I managed to say, "It was OK."

With a new baby less than six weeks away, I should probably get used to our lives being a little more chaotic than we're used to.  But seriously - no more cupcakes.

Take Luck,

LP