Monday, April 25, 2011

Love Letter

Dear Butthead,

You scared the shiza out of me tonight... And you aren't even home from work yet.  Tonight while I was showering and singing along (to myself) to Ludo's "Anything For You," I swore I heard you cry out "Helloooo?!" from somewhere in the house in your apparent happiness to be home.  Hearing this cry caused me to immediately stop the bathing process and listen.  I hear nothing.  No jingle-jangle or barking.  My heart started to race and I started yelling back to the invisible voice "Ryan?  Helloooo?  Are you there?  If you are trying to scare me, I'm going to come out there and kick your (enter choice word)!!!!"

No reply.

Normally (and most normal people) would have just shaken this off and continued on.  Not me.  I started to have a semi-panic attack and cried a little.  Why did I start to panic and cry?  Because this scaring business is exactly something that you would do.  You say it's good for me, and I say that's a bunch of hogwash.  In fact, as I write this and you are clearly not home, my heart is still racing. 

Despite my currently elevated blood pressure, I have to admit that your desire to scare me is one of those "little things" about you that I have truly come to love.  Even though you get so much enjoyment out of my suffering, I love that it makes you laugh.

Take Luck and some Anti-Anxiety Medication,

**While laying down and waiting for Ryan to get home from work tonight, I tuned into an old Friends epsiode.  Coincidentally, the episode was "The One with Unagi," and was all about Ross trying to educate Rachel and Pheobe on Unagi (apparently a state of total awareness in which you can be prepared for any danger).  He startles them in the hallway of the apartment to prove his point that they are not Unagi-savvy.  During this episode, Rachel and Pheobe have been taking a self-defense class.  At the end of the episode, Ross goes to the instructor asking for tips on how to attack women.  Quite hilarious.  Check out the link below to get a taste of Unagi.

1 comment:

  1. Ahhh. Salmon skin roll.

    "Unagi" came up in my neuroanatomy class a couple semesters ago, and nobody knew what I was talking about. This post makes me have faith.


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